he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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