You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
