I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Damn victory sex feels great
Randomize
