if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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