Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
