there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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