Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
