I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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