Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Randomize
