you're like a bully in the Christmas story
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
