I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
