Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
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Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
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your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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