covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
