just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
You should frame my arrest warrant.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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