who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
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i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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