Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
