Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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