Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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