I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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