Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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