Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
