He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
