similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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