Nicole vs. Life
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Randomize