so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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