I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize