We named our party play list daddy issues
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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