Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
another moral hangover. fuck.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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