i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
