Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
the liver wants what the liver wants
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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