What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I just googled if crying burns calories
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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