my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
