I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
handjob tips. give me some.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
