Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
