sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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