'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I'm having to shit out rocks
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