before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
