I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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