Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Randomize
