My Higher Power is John Stamos
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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