So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Did you just see the Batmobile???
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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