apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
