for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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