You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
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It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
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Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner