I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
