If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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