so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
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