Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
