This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize