at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
